I say really deep stuff on the internet

I dont really know much about blogging, or really like the best way to start a post, but yet I am sitting here drinking 10 dollar wine and typing shit anyways. It seems a little narcissistic- this whole blogging thing- like me and my little laptop have really insightful crap to say that needs to be shared with the world. Or like probably my mom and my husband- because likely no one else will read this. Huh- I say "like" alot.
But its kinda like (I know, sorry, I cant stop saying it) when you read the first paragraph of a book and you are completely judging whether you are going to invest yourself into a book or not. And if I am not taken in by the first few pages alot of the time I am all "you know what book, I am really freaking busy and there are other books out there. Like better books with really witty and insightful shit right there in the first few pages, and I think instead of reading you I may have to just move on with my life. Because I could totally read a better book." Or I could read about Tom and Katie's divorce in People magazine, or I could post wacky ecards on Pinterest, or even post crazy adorable pictures of my kids on facebook because no one ever gets tired of seeing those. Ever. I mean my kids are adorable.
So my point was this feels like a lot of pressure this whole starting a blog first post thing, because people (I'm talking to you mom) are totally judging me right now, and it feels a little anxious for me. Like I need to come up with something mind shattering and pull you in and then you can be all "oh wow, I was feeling really down on myself but then I read Susannah's blog and I think I will start eating organic and plant a garden or maybe just change my life". But I am tired and I have nothing, so sorry to let you down. You should really go down to the river, build a bridge and get over it because its really kind of presumptuous of you to expect all that just from reading a stupid blog. Get over yourself.